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It Takes a Village... a Hunting Story:
Part One

by David Scherer
Read
Part Two | Read Part Three
There was conflict at the home-fire. I had hunted
seventeen days without seeing anything other than the elk or deer
that fled my headlights in the pre-dawn. Eight days for archery
cow elk, five days for first rifle either sex, and now, four days
for second season deer. I was agonizing over my buzzard's luck
with my wife, Minda. I needed to be validated, hugged, reassured
before making a final attempt to turn things around. There were
just five days left in second season. My flagging manhood needed
propped up. Deep inside, my confidence sagged beneath the weight
of failure.
The seventeenth day had proven too much for me. I was totally
defeated at Devil's Mountain. Pessimism had overtaken me. I could
not sit still, nothing felt right. I had lost my groove. The groove
had now become a full-blown rut, not to be confused with the mating
season. The dry leaves crackled beneath my feet like cannon shots,
the brush was too thick for anything but a desperate shot. Desperate
summed up what I was feeling. I needed to find a fresh sign but
there was none. I would have given my lunch for a steaming pile
of brown pellets.
Minda scowled at me with that superior look women have when they
occupy the higher ground. It was the sneering look of one who
was on the visitor side of the plexi-glass in a mental institution.
She had rightly divined my weakened condition and I was pathetic
in her sight. There I sat, broadside and vulnerable, the very
thing that had been denied me while hunting. Her skeptical eye
was cocked and she peered down at me along her elliptical nose
just like a rifle sight. I cringed, waiting for the shot.
Any hope for my flagging manhood was crushed by the thinly disguised
cynicism of her words, "Why don't you just quit! Give it
up." I had read almost those exact words somewhere. Of course,
they were the words of Job's wife, "Curse God and die."
Mrs. Job continued her diatribe, "Laith has a soccer tournament
in Cortez this weekend and I am tired of doing it alone."
I can't believe she played the guilt card. I agree, her words
are not without some whiff of logic. If my hunting was a business
venture; then it was bankrupt. If it was an oil well, it was a
dry hole. But hunting, is like gambling, it is an addiction. The
next hand will make you a winner. Perseverance will win the day.
I had talked to recent winners. Joe, who was semi-prone, when
a bull followed his scent trail and stared at him from forty yards.
Joe slowly raised himself up and was surprised to find the bull
in his scope. Curiosity kills the bull because he thought Joe
was an exotic. Clarence was a winner with a 6x6 opening day. His
season lasted fifteen minutes of dawn. I have had coffee breaks
longer than that when I was working! Seventeen days, phooey! He
guided a friend to the same spot the following weekend and repeated
the feat. I have to get Clarence a Christmas gift this year. My
own hunting partner took an elk calf after jumping them in their
beds. He sat on a stump and cow called as a last resort. It must
have been a nursing call because the calf ran off the mountain
to within twenty yards of him like he was a (blank). We have a
mountain named after it.
Maybe you are noting a little jealousy here. That didn't happen
till I saw my neighbor with a fine buck hanging in his garage.
Took it at 9:10, a running shot in the neck at seventy yards.
His manhood was justly brimming. Or maybe it happened when meeting
the Texan who had encountered a cow elk leisurely strolling in
front of him at thirty yards earlier in the morning. He wished
he had a cow tag. He did! It was first season. We each pulled
our license and held them side by side to make the comparison.
There it was in bold-slash letters, E/S. That means Either Sex
I informed him, not all my 'ex's live in Texas.' I would have
felt smug, as a local, but it was just a Texan. It wasn't that
long ago I was one.
I found myself starved for words in these exchanges with other
hunters who had taken or saw game. The inevitable question came,
"Have you got anything?" I mumble something evasive
and optimistic. "The aspens are nice this time of year,"
is my closer. There, I put the best face on it I could muster.
But I know my upbeat reply was false and they knew it too. I blamed
the full moon, or I could not get high enough, and then there
were too many out-of-staters where I hunted. The gurgle of my
own inadequacy made it awkward but closer to the truth. We diverted
our eyes from each other in the painful moment. This signaled
the obligatory congratulation on my part, it was tinny and mere
lip service. Envy is a horrible thing in a human being, forcing
us onto the stage, playing roles we never auditioned for. I have
five days left to take a leading role and get my buck.
At my regrouping dinner that night with family, my young hunting
partner, Lucas, told how we had climbed to the top of a mountain
and sat on a sunny slope overlooking Piedra Road in the far distance.
The sun was warm and I soon came under its spell. I fell asleep
and began snoring, so I am told. A chipmunk charged to the end
of a nearby log and began scolding me for disturbing his peace.
The little arms flailed the air for emphasis like Hitler. My son,
Laith, found that scene extremely funny and began rewriting it
like a Mel Brooks movie where a gang of chipmunks lined up behind
my prone body and on the count of three gave a collective shove
to send me rolling down the mountain like a log. The family roared
at the vision. This does not happen to a hunter that has game
hanging or elk for the night's entree.
Five days left to erase this mocking image of my 2005 hunt or
this would be my winter legacy. I needed to do something drastic,
something unconventional. Then it came in one of those flashes
of brilliance, impossible to conjure up, so blessedly simple.
Hunt in my own backyard! I live in Twincreek Village and we see
mule deer all the time in the summer. Last fall I saw five bucks
from my son's bedroom window. How fitting would it be to leave
the pungent smell of gunpowder clinging to his beanie babies?
I should have been ashamed but last night's reverie still clung
to my fragile psyche. The window shot was out of the question;
I had neighbors. But the solution lay minutes away inside the
U.S. National Forest, which was very near my backyard.
The more I thought on it, the better it sounded. I had been trying
too hard, pressing where I should have been in the moment. I know
it is a cliché but it lives true. Off came the pressure
to have game hanging. I was coming back to a purer place…a
hunter's higher ground. It was exhilarating; I had my groove back.
There was no anxiety when I turned the alarm off and sauntered
to the kitchen to make coffee. Steaming cup in hand, I turned
on the fireplace and read for the pleasure of inspiration. The
ticking of the clock was audible in the still darkness but I refused
to be brought under its rule. For the first time, I was hunting
my near backyard, on my own terms; how totally liberating. I packed
my lunch and slipped into the garage. The diesel sputtered and
coughed like an old nag that had been forced from the barn one
too many times in the pre-dawn. It found its fire and I backed
out into the darkness. It never had a chance to warm up before
I shut it off again to hunt.
The neighbor's houses were still dark when I turned my back on
the village and carefully picked my way over rock and fallen trees
that were made visible only in shadows and shades of gray. First
light was silvery and had barely crested the canyon as I reached
the fence. This was the barbed line, the mystical separation of
two kingdoms. On one side stood the village and on the other side,
the wild forest. It was there for our kind only; animals found
it a minor annoyance, imagining it to be a part of creation. I
walked the defining line threaded through the aspen. Nearby was
a hollow where the lower wire was at its highest and I could crawl
under it. It loomed in front of me and I passed my rifle through
the fence, which I carefully leaned against a post.
Continued in Part Two
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